Monday, September 11, 2006

Scientologists Don't Know the Weather


I mean, you'd figure being Scientologists they would probably have more insight into the weather. Wait, that's what Scientologists believe in right? Anyway, as if Tom and Katie couldn't infuriate me any more, they have now turned into the people that I hate the most. First, I hate when people use an umbrella for any other purpose except rain. That's right. Unless you're The Penguin from Batman put away the umbrella. Ok so it's sunny. Guess what? Add some sun screen just like every other person. The umbrella makes you look crazy. The umbrella makes you look like Michael Jackson walking into the courthouse prior to a molestation trial.

While every other guy at the game is probably having a beer and wearing shorts, Tom you're in tight black jeans (circa 1991) and a blue longsleeve dress shirt. Katie, you're in black shorts-pants(??) with legs as white, if not whiter, than your shirt. Surprisingly, your pants are looser than your husbands. Go figure. I tell you this because I also feel that Scientologists aren't allowed to utilize mirrors, clearly.

It starts off with umbrellas and next thing you know you have flippers, goggles, and a snorkel for the public pool. Yup, the other thing I hate. Smarten up or else I'm calling DSS.

Who knew this was turning into "An Open Letter to Tom and Katie." I guess it has.

No comments: