Thursday, March 29, 2007

America's Next Top Model: Dieting Plus Sized Models, Huh?

Resident America's Next Top Model recapper, Jenny, is back once again for her thoughts on the train-wreck that is America's Next Top Model. Let's see what her thoughts are this time around:
  • I don't understand Natasha's hair. Is it crimped, or is it a Halloween wig?And why does Natasha make cat noises at her husband when she talks to him on the phone?
  • Why is the plus size model dieting? Aren't plus size models supposed to be plus?
  • The models get a lesson on how to dress. Russian chick tries to make some kind of point and the fashion directors literally look at her like she just said: "Space aliens are outside waiting to pick me up in a spaceship made out of sneakers."
  • It's competition time and the girls have to break into groups, dress up like mannequins and pretend they are in a store window. At one point, Russian chick says it's ok to spell words however you want to. Really? I wonder if the nuns who gave me my spelling tests in grammar school would agree with that. Probably not. They would probably hit me with a ruler and make me say three Hail Mary's.
  • Sara wins the individual prize and wins some type of something with Jay and her own pictures. Nonsense. I would be pissed if I was her since last week's prize was a $40,000 bracelet.
  • During this week's photo shoot, the girls dress up like guys, and pose with guys who dress up like women. And people wonder why America's youth is a mess.
  • Jaslene is a nautical man on his yacht. Ok. She seriously looks like a hobo under a bridge.
  • Jael is a bohemian man. She looks like a child molester from 1984.
  • Whitney kinda looks like the Reverend Al Sharpton.
  • Natasha looks like K-Fed and makes a better K-Fed, than K-Fed himself.
  • For the 5th week in a row, Tyra does one hell of a Russian accent. Can she hear herself?
  • Blah, blah, blah Diana gets kicked off.
  • Now there is only one full figured model "still in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model." My question is, why does Tyra act like she can't get her arms around her when she hugs her goodbye? She is ridiculous.

No comments: