Thursday, October 25, 2007

ANTM: Ebony and Goodbyery

Even though it was Game 1 of the World Series for the Red Sox, America's Next Top Model recapper, Jenny, was good enough to multi-task and really recap the piss outta ANTM and still watch the Red Sox. That's dedication. Here's how Jenny felt about last night's episode of America's...Next....Top......Model:


  • Ok, the Red Sox are in the World Series. So I've Tivo'd (God Bless Tivo) ANTM so I can watch this episode in speedy-like manner in between innings.

  • Tyson Beckford shows up to train the girls as spokes models. The girls react as though it is the second coming of Christ. Jesus is my savior!

  • During this week's challenge, the girls must do a 30 second public service announcement regarding AIDS in Africa. No jokes here, as this is not funny. They put the girls in groups of three and give them a few minutes to get their presentation together.

  • Heather, Jenah and Ambreal win the challenge. Jenah and Ambreal win gift bags, and Heather wins a photo shoot with Mary J. Blige. If I was Jenah and Ambreal, I would be totally pissed. I wouldn't even WANT my gift bag. I would just give it to Benny Ninja.

  • The girls have a pretend sleepover in the closet (what?) and Ebony reveals that she doesn't want to be there, modeling isn't for her. I think the other girls should pack all her shit up, and kick her out the door right then and there.

  • The photo shoot has the girls posing as recycling materials. This includes trash bags, car parts, bubble wrap and oil. Oil?? Where does Tyra come up with this stuff? Does she flip through the dictionary with her eyes closed and point?

  • It's judging time and Nigel is sporting a fake afro wig. I am waiting for him to introduce himself as "The New Jan Brady!" But he doesn't and I feel let down.

  • Tyra's elimination joke of the week: "Which of you is going back to the recycling bin?" Stupid.

  • Miss Jay's hair is growing at the speed of light. Also stupid. Maybe he could give some of his hair to Bianca. Like a hair donor.

  • Ambreal and Ebony are in the bottom two this week. Tyra tells us that Ambreal is no longer in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model. However, in a shocking twist (and by shocking twist I mean probably scripted) Ebony tells Tyra that she wants to go home. Tyra dismisses her and Ambreal dodges a bullet until next week. So what is the lesson of the week boys and girls? The Red Sox won 13-1.

ANTM: Ebony and Goodbyery