Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Catholic Church So Pissed at Britney, They Can Barely Focus On Molesting Their Alter-Boys

This may be hard to believe, but Britney is in the news again. This time it's because of her new album, which I believe is called "Baby One More Time." Britney is dressed like a widowed streetwalker and is sitting on the lap of a "priest" in the confessional booth. The Catholic church, of course, is outraged at this as it really cuts back on the amount of time they can focus on trying to molest their alter boys and raise enough money to pay their legal bills due to the thousands of molestation cases against them. Geesh, I'd be mad too.

One spokesperson for the Catholic league has said, "She should be trying to be an entertainer without mocking a Catholic sacrament." True. Oh, yeah, you know what else is kinda true? A spokesperson for IBBB has issued the following statement to the spokesperson of the Catholic league. "Priests should be trying to be holy-like without molesting children." While I know that's not a sacrament it should just go without saying.

Look, I'm not saying all priests are diddle-monsters, but probably the majority of them. While Britney is "train-wreck-hot-sex-on-a-plate," there is nothing wrong with these pictures. I mean, maybe if her "gentlemen greeter" was showing that could be an issue, but I think the Catholic's who are obsessed out there should just be pleased that photographs are out there with a girl of legal age on the lap of a priest....with key focus on "girl of legal age." This is actually some good press for them, no?


Anonymous said...

WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU. Get your facts straight before you make a statement like that. Confession is suppossed to be a sacred act between GOD and us. Do I think that its wrong for priest to molest kids? I think its wrong for just anyone to do that.
I think that she a ridiculous little loser that has to use such controversy to raise some eyebrows and sell some records.
On the other hand, maybe she confessed some of her sins and tried to save her soul from the eternal doom that is probably heading and this photos weren't a total waste.

Diddle-Monster Equals Giggle-Monster aka Me said...

Geez, I was just going to say that I'm STILL giggling whenever I think of the word "Diddle-Monster" but "Anonymous" pretty much sucked the giggle right out of me with that opening line in all capitals! I'm glad that she/he made that statement a rhetorical question, though, by not adding a question mark at end...cuz I don't think he/she is really ready to go down that road....the list of "what's wrong with you" miiigghhhtt get pretty lengthy...I'm not going to say that it would rival the length of Santa's "To Do List"on Christmas Eve...but...well...okay maybe I am. ...don't worry though...mine would be equally as long so if you carry the two and divide by 22 they cancel each other out...thus making us normal, if I did my math correctly...but I wouldn't bet the farm on that one since the first item on my list is "atrocious at math"....Oops...
PS...I solemnly swear that I have now finally hit my usage quota for the word "Diddle-Monster" really has upped your "brilliance quotient" in my book though :)

Jessica said...