Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Dakota Fanning: The Town Whore


I told you. I told you it would come to this. It was only a matter of time. Move your freckles to the left Lindsay. Slide your gentlemen greeter to the right, Britney. There's a new whore in town and her name is Dakota Fanning. Dressed as a traditional street walker, Dakota was on location filming her new movie, "Push." Way to smut it up, Dakota. Actually, I know it's for a movie and I don't care, but I am waiting and waiting for Dakota to take a turn for the worse (or go south) so I can finally call her by her future nickname, "South Dakota." I like to call that my Bazooka Joe joke. I will blog and blog until one day I can call her South Dakota and then I will stop blogging.

Anyway, Dakota who is 13-years old was just named one of the top earning celebrities under 25 years old, named by Forbes. At just 13, Dakota brought in $4 million. Well, $3 million and another $1 million from the tooth fairy. By 16 yrs old, Dakota will officially make more money than I will ever see in my lifetime. Although we'll see who laughs last, South Dakota, we'll see.
Dakota Fanning: The Town Whore

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

she's 12 you sick fuck!

anna hilton said...

i thought this was pretty damn funny
and i dont normally say nice things to people so it means something

Anonymous said...

You sick bastard. How can you call Dakota Fanning, the best actress ever a whore?! As far as I am concerned, she is God. The reason she makes that much money is because she is such an awesome actress. You are just jealous of her because she is way better than you, you fat-ass, mud-slinging, sonbitch!

The Other White Meat Hilton said...

I thought Anna Hilton's comment was pretty funny and I don't normally say nice things to her.

Anonymous said...

I'd fuck her

Anonymous said...

the anonymous above must be her carpet-munching, child molesting mother...and apparantly you are a "sonbitch"..i guess thats just her wording for "i take it up the ass daily by dogs"

Anonymous said...

Ha ha ha I think she's doing great for herself ha ha ha
JIK all

Anonymous said...

I'd fuck her little brains out, and video tape myself doing it in 1080i, too. She's definately one of the more fuckable young starlets of hollywood. You know you would, too. Fuckin' conformists.