Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Related: Super Cute Homemade Costumes for the Last Minute Halloween Goer
Is it just me or is anyone else over Halloween already!?! Bring on All Saints Day. Woo-hoo!
Audrina's Halloween Party, From Hell
One spokesperson for the Catholic league has said, "She should be trying to be an entertainer without mocking a Catholic sacrament." True. Oh, yeah, you know what else is kinda true? A spokesperson for IBBB has issued the following statement to the spokesperson of the Catholic league. "Priests should be trying to be holy-like without molesting children." While I know that's not a sacrament it should just go without saying.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
~ Sienna Miller is a 60 Year Old Man ~ AgentBedHead
~ Jonathan Rhys Meyers Looks Like a Diddler ~ Popbytes
~ Paris to Swing By Rwanda Next Year ~ EvilBeet
~ Nicole Richie Already a Good Mom ~ NinjaDude
~ Lindsay Lohan. Still Sober. Still Boring. ~ Yeeeah
~ Hollywood Halloween Won't Stop ~ FatBack
~Does LC have Mom-Face? ~ POTP
~ Sarah Jessica is Pretty ~ Ayyyy
- Whitney has chosen a church as the location for this god-for-saken Young Hollywood fashion show. Lisa Loveless' combover is looking especially hot tonight. Plus, Lisa is wearing her sunglasses in the church as if Jesus spots her he will naturally strike her dead.
- When Lisa Loveless smiles I wait for bugs to crawl out from her teeth. Me gusta Lisa Loveless.
- Uh, what in the Christ is Whitney wearing to the meeting with Lisa Loveless and Lauren? It's the cross between a bed sheet and a skirt. Is this really what people wear to work?
- It's great that Lisa still looks at Lauren like she's a complete idiot. Point taken.
- Yeah, can Whitney stop interrupting Lisa by tossing in buzzwords? Rude.
- Whitney and Lauren are carting their asses to NYC (see you soon) and Lisa's advice to them, "Come back successfully and quickly." Uh, ok. Wait, huh? They're not running an errand to the corner store for you, they're flying across the country. Not quite sure how "quickly" they can make it back. Regardless, bonus points for Lisa showing some arm in her outfit. Loveless arm. Priceless.
- Does Whitney have abnormally small hands?
- Alright alright! Steve Sanders is heading back to, AGAIN, Bolthouse to stalk Heidi. Wait, what is this I see? Well will ya look at that! Frankie just happens to be walking out of Bolthouse as Steve Sanders is walking in. What are the odds of that? Well, since it's scripted, the odds are very good.
- What the hell happens at Bolthouse anyway? It seems like people just walk in and out of that place and somehow get paid. Where do I sign up? I would like to recap The Hills right from Brent Bolthouse's office, assuming his computer is a real computer and not one of those cardboard ones that they have in furniture stores.
- Does Steve Sanders have a crush on Brody? He tells Frankie that he was Brody's loyal friend for years. He defended him. He fought for him. Really? Did he just say that? I immediately think of the song from Robin Hood. "I would fight for you, I'd lie for you, walk the wire for you, ya I'd die for you. You know it's true, everything I do, I do it for you."
- Ok thanks Frankie. Now go and "spend your money." Your character this season is extremely useless and not needed. Hope to see next episode.
- Lauren and Whitney have arrived in NYC for their big business meeting and I believe that Whitney's boobs are falling out of her dress. Yup, they are.
- Best quote of the episode, perhaps, is when they're waiting to meet their Teen Vogue person and Lauren asks Whitney if she practiced her presentation and Whitney replies, "Um, no not really." Award winning. Way to be a real go-getter Whitney!
- Amy Astley looks like she's wearing a wig.
- Lauren is looking hot as hell in her dress and looks like someone grew herself a little bit of an ass. It's fitting that they play J Lo's "Doin' It Well" as Lauren walks out of the office.
- Ha, so Lauren is racing off to Marc Jacobs and actually runs into the taxi and says, "72 Spring Street and I'm in a hurry." Really? Who says that unless you're in a 1950's black-and-white movie!? 72 Spring Street and step on it! Follow that taxi!
- So Lauren's job for the day is to help dress the models and put bow-ties on them or something. Do you think it's kind of ridiculous that she has to do this when she's kinda making $25,000 an episode filming "The Hills?"
- Oh God. Whitney blew the meeting. Whitney is kind of giving her presentation in a prom dress.
- Although, Whitney is a bit of a trooper when they nix all of her plans, basically. When Amy asks Whitney exactly where those flowers are going I would have simply replied, "I don't know Amy, up your ass?"
- Second best quote of the episode from Lauren after getting to meet Marc Jacobs, "I'm going to give Lisa Love a hug and then run away because I'm afraid what she'll do to me." Awesome. She'll hug you back Lauren. She'll run her hands down your back and get very inappropriate. Basically, she'll make you a woman. Good luck with that.
- Are you kidding me with this? Steve Sanders calls Brody and leaves him a message. That's all that happens. Yeah, we saw that in the commercial 3,000 times during the week. We were looking for a little more than that.
- Brody goes over to the set of Lauren's apartment and they talk up Steve Sanders. Boring.
Next week we get to see more of Lisa Loveless and Heidi's 21st birthday. Strange how Heidi has been on camera drinking for about 3 years now.
The Hills Goes to New York
Seeing pictures of Kelly Rowland got me to thinking about a bunch of different things. First off, I thought about how much I missed Destiny's Child singing about their fat asses, breaking their lease so they can't move, it's 11:30 and the party's jumpin' jumpin', and singing no no no no no when it's really yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. I realized that other members of Destiny's Child on their own really bore me. To me, they're kinda like a sober Lindsay Lohan. Pointless. Then I got to thinking how Kelly Rowland masters the spandex unitard, yes "unitard" without showing a glimpse of the cameltoe. That really disappoints me. Now if that was Beyonce in the unitard it would have been so tight I would have been able to tell what day of her period she was on. What?
Anyway, Kelly Rowland was "in concert" in London singing her greatest hits such as.....uh...and her other huge song...er....and then she closed with...umm. I would have been fine with her singing "Say My Name" on repeat. I miss Destiny's Child. They better get their asses back in that recording studio. My iPod is missing them.
What's My Name, What's My Name
Who Shot That Whore!?
Monday, October 29, 2007
Friday, October 26, 2007
Gavin sat down with someone over at VH1 to discuss his horrific experience. Here's some of what went down:
Gavin Beasley: Last year I was booked on an editorial modeling gig, posing with Lauren for this interview she did in People Magazine. We got along, and she kept trying to set me up with Heidi, because she was on a break from Spencer or something back then, and Lauren was trying to get her to move on. But nothing ever happened with that and Lauren was dating Jason (Wahler) at the time, so we didn't keep in touch at all. Then in August I got a call from my agency to go to a casting call for Teen Vogue, and Lauren and the camera crews just so happened to be there. She remembered me from our shoot, and the next thing I know, a producer's asking me to ask Lauren for her number, and I'm signing release forms and being shot for The Hills. They wanted me to ask her about the runway show, how long she had worked that day, when would she get off, stuff like that.
Gavin Beasley: Absolutely, from the very beginning. Like, they totally set up the BBQ scene for Brody and I to meet each other and talk because, as they said, "the audience would get a kick out of seeing 'the ex' talking to 'the new guy'." So they rent this house in Malibu for a set, bought a bunch of food and drinks, and just filmed us hanging out. Brody would talk all this sh*t, then be like, "Sorry about that, we're just trying to make good television." Like at one point, some other dude walked up to us while we were talking, and Brody goes, "We're trying to film a scene here. Do you mind?", like he's interrupting our lines. Haha, it was some of the best acting I've ever done.
Gavin Beasley: I honestly had a really hard time talking to her - she's kind of a conversation killer, and when the cameras are rolling, all conversation is kept firmly on the surface. She talked about how mean Perez Hilton was, and how you have to be nice to the Paparazzi so they don't release the uglier pictures of you. I don't know - pop culture, Red Bull, stuff like that. In fact, the most interesting thing I got out of her was that she isn't allowed to eat ice cream because her trainer told her she can't.
Gavin Beasley: Well we shot all this back in August, and I didn't film anything else, nor did I talk to Lauren again after our date night. Someone from MTV called two weeks later to see about me asking Lauren and Whitney out on a double date, but nothing happened with that. In fact, I actually feel like I had more of a relationship with my MTV contact than I ever did with Lauren.
Gavin Talks "The Hills"
As you know, every now and then I like to break off from the celebrity news just to clear my head. Typically, I do this in a "rant," but this time I'm doing it with a new little segment I like to call, "Am I Wrong?"
- No, I don't want to pet your dog. Just because you're walking a dog doesn't mean I want it liking my hand or leg. I may not know your dog, but I am certain that he drinks out of the toilet and licks himself. Yeah, I'm all set with that toilet tongue on me, thanks. Am I wrong?
- If you're a guy and wearing capri pants, why? I don't care if you're gay, straight, etc, but why capri pants? Is it hot out? Will those keep you cool? Is it cool out? Will those keep you warm? Why are you showing off your ankle area? Please stop it, at once. Am I wrong?
- If it's hot out and sunny and my face is red, don't ask me if I have a sun-burn. What do you think? And don't ask me if it hurts? My face is red and about 200 degrees. Yes it hurts. Does that bottle I just broke over your head tickle? Am I wrong?
- Don't look at me weird and say, "Is that a grey hair?" What do you think? Next time you ask that I'm going to look behind you and say, "Is that a fat ass?" Am I wrong?
- If all you have to say to me on an elevator is "Is it Friday yet?" don't even bother talking to me. No it isn't Friday yet. You know when it is Friday? When it actually is Friday. P.S if you say "Hot enough for ya?" please just immediately exit the elevator. Am I wrong?
- Why is it that when someone honks their horn everyone seems to look? Do you think you're that important that the horn is for you? How important could you be? You're walking. Am I wrong?
- Yeah, if you're sneezing all over the place and then tell me "oh don't worry I'm not sick, it's just allergies" I don't care. There is still snot flying out of your nose at 100 miles per hour and landing all over the place. I don't care if it's "cold snot" or "allergy snot." It's still snot and I still don't want it on me. Am I wrong?
That's all. Thank you.
This Time Last Year: Kirsten Dunst
Thursday, October 25, 2007
~ Zac Efron Enjoys Lingerie ~ AgentBedHead
~ Ronald McDonald: Paparazi Whore ~ Popbytes
~ Cheri Oteri Strikes Again! ~ EvilBeet
~ Beyonce in a Unitard ~ FatBack
~ Halle's Berry's Grew ~ Yeeeah
~ Paula Isn't a Mess Because She Says So ~ POTP
~ Jessica Biel Hates the 'Razzi ~ NinjaDude
~ Ashlee Olsen Has "The Joker's" Smile ~ INO
- Ok, the Red Sox are in the World Series. So I've Tivo'd (God Bless Tivo) ANTM so I can watch this episode in speedy-like manner in between innings.
- Tyson Beckford shows up to train the girls as spokes models. The girls react as though it is the second coming of Christ. Jesus is my savior!
- During this week's challenge, the girls must do a 30 second public service announcement regarding AIDS in Africa. No jokes here, as this is not funny. They put the girls in groups of three and give them a few minutes to get their presentation together.
- Heather, Jenah and Ambreal win the challenge. Jenah and Ambreal win gift bags, and Heather wins a photo shoot with Mary J. Blige. If I was Jenah and Ambreal, I would be totally pissed. I wouldn't even WANT my gift bag. I would just give it to Benny Ninja.
- The girls have a pretend sleepover in the closet (what?) and Ebony reveals that she doesn't want to be there, modeling isn't for her. I think the other girls should pack all her shit up, and kick her out the door right then and there.
- The photo shoot has the girls posing as recycling materials. This includes trash bags, car parts, bubble wrap and oil. Oil?? Where does Tyra come up with this stuff? Does she flip through the dictionary with her eyes closed and point?
- It's judging time and Nigel is sporting a fake afro wig. I am waiting for him to introduce himself as "The New Jan Brady!" But he doesn't and I feel let down.
- Tyra's elimination joke of the week: "Which of you is going back to the recycling bin?" Stupid.
- Miss Jay's hair is growing at the speed of light. Also stupid. Maybe he could give some of his hair to Bianca. Like a hair donor.
- Ambreal and Ebony are in the bottom two this week. Tyra tells us that Ambreal is no longer in the running towards becoming America's Next Top Model. However, in a shocking twist (and by shocking twist I mean probably scripted) Ebony tells Tyra that she wants to go home. Tyra dismisses her and Ambreal dodges a bullet until next week. So what is the lesson of the week boys and girls? The Red Sox won 13-1.
This all got me to thinking. (1) I still sweat Kristin (2) Nice boobs (3) Where has she been (4) and most importantly, what if the producers of "The Hills" replaced Heidi with Kristin? No joke, that would be brilliant. Then, they could replace Steve Sanders (aka Spencer) with Steven. Then, they could replace Audrina with Alex H. Then they could replace Audrina's teeth with Dieter. Then, they could replace Whitney with Alex M. And then finally they could slightly tweak the name of the show "The Hills" to something catchy like....oh I don't know...."Laguna Beach." Brilliant, right? I would still keep Lisa Loveless though, as she is (similar to me) a national treasure.
Remember Kristin from Laguna Beach?
Putting 2 and 2 together (7) I realized that the task of this "episode" will be selling tickets to Broadway shows. Omorosa was barely doing anything. No joke. She just basically stood there and barely even said "Hairspray tickets." She seemed pissed. I figured the puppet she had on her hand would cheer her up, but sadly it did not. I was also disappointed that I didn't hear the dramatic music playing, but then realized I wasn't in the boardroom. At one point some lady with a big mouth (who I would bet my life was the lady who was one of the judges on "The Swan") was screaming into the camera. I was embarrassed for her. I was embarrassed for me. I decided to walk back to work.
IBBB and Omarosa: Together At Last
Bon Jovi in Bed With LeAnn Rimes
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Do you think with Britney's constant hair color change and eye color change her kids can even recognize her? Doesn't matter. I doubt they care. When they see her they're probably like, "Ugh! This lady again."
In additional Britney Spears news of the minute:
- Her parenting coach has given her a bad review for ignoring her
- Her friends and family are asking people to boycott her new album until she gets some help
- Her new album, Blackout, isn't getting the best reviews
- Britney, allegedly, still hasn't paid her VMA backup dancers. Haven't they paid enough?
Product # 1 - Are you looking for your own personal cameltoe maker? I knew you were. Well, while it looks like a cameltoe party in the front it is a complete mess in the back. Now you can wrap yourself up like a Christmas present, but do me a favor...do everyone a favor, don't ask your husband unwrap that present because if/when he does it's going to look like Santa left him two lumps of coal in your pants. This could possibly the most dramatic before and after photo ever. Before, this lady has a piping hot fresh dump in her pants. After she puts on the "miracle body suit" her ass is smaller, her arms are technically shorter, her hair is a little lighter, and I think, I think, her pants are on backwards or her lower body is on backwards. Way to be sexy Harriet. Ho-ho-ho.
Product # 2 - At first glance I pondered why this "lady" had a blue bra covering her eyes...with the boobs still in the bra. Then I pondered why this "lady" was smiling whilst taking a slumber. Then I realized, hey wait a minute this ain't no "lady!" This is "failure model chick!" What a treat/surprise. Scratch that. What a surprise/treat. Poor "failure model chick." Can it get any worse for her? This time she is modeling a "bra sleeper" that covers the majority of her face. Poor thing. Why can't I model this crap? They can cover my face, I'm fine with it! Anyway, have sexy rest "failure model chick." Wait a minute, if your bra is on your face...what's covering your...Oh "failure model chick" you feisty little minx, you!
Product # 3 - You're probably thinking, "what kind of sexual innuendo could there be about this beloved blanket?" Well that's what I thought. Then I read the name of the product. It's called, "Kissing Kitty." Oh yeah? Really? Kissing Kitty? I'm almost positive that's also the name of a porno. Just because you toss some angel wings on it, doesn't make this little skank sweet. Even check out the facial expression of that beast of a women holding up this blanket? Even she's thinking something is a bit fishy about the name of this blanket. Kissing Kitty? Harriet Carter? Try, Harriet Dice Clay. Oh!
Product # 4 - Gone Ridin? Oh I bet you have Harriet. Men, women, dogs, horses, cats, cardboard cutouts of the Pope. Harriet doesn't discriminate. She rides until the horse passes out (if you know what I mean and I think you do cuz I'm 10). Gone are the days of having to place a wire hanger on the door of your bedroom when you're having "company" over for the night (I saw that once on Family Ties, so I just assumed). Now you can just simply place this pillow right in front of your door. Gone Ridin! Yeee-Haw! This also makes a delightful gift for a prostitute in almost any neighborhood. I know this is a little off topic, but who the hell loves horse THAT much that you need a pillow to show your love of horses. I'm getting a pillow that says "Busy Eating Chicken Parm Subs." I like Chicken Parm Subs, I like to sleep on pillows. Clearly, I need a pillow that shows that I like Chicken Parm subs. No? Anyway, happy riding Harriet. That horse will make you a woman before you know it!
In closing, I wanted to say hello to the Harriet Carter readers over at SweetConfusion. I'm not really sure what SweetConfusion is, but I know it's some type of message board and they created a little Harriet Carter section. I like anyone who will help me sell out, so thanks SweetConfusion, thank you!
Harriet Carter: Sexual Innuendos. Ow!!!
Harriet Carter Recaps
I'd like to provide an update on "Operation Sellout." It's going very well. I have achieved a major goal of mine: Being a Background Person. Check that right off the list. About a month ago I was walking around Bryant Park in NYC during Fashion Week and was hot on Carrie Underwood's trail. The paparazzi started to swarm and I knew that this was my chance to become "a background person." Well there I am! A background person. These photos were actually posted over at ImNotObsessed just the other day. The girl I was with that day was reading another site (sacrilegious) and she spotted me! Brilliant!
I'm hoping that US Weekly starts a new segment called, "Background People, They're Just Like Us!" I'll start. I'm a background person, I'm just like you! I stalk celebrities with my camera phone in one hand and my coffee in the other. I'm just like you, I clearly dress like a lumberjack. I'm just like you, I'm an idiot. See? That was easy. See you in the pages of Us Weekly!
Special Note to the following people: The Olsen Sluts, Dina Lohan, Tyra Banks, Jennifer Aniston. If you see that face (in the photo above) coming towards you while walking the streets of NYC, do me a favor, just let me put you in a headlock and let's call it a day. Don't make me have to chase you. Thanks, in advance, for your cooperation.
So when Michael Richards and Mel Gibson say it, they have a problem. When Halle says it, it's cute. Ok fine, it is. Probably because Halle is hot. Stereotypes are hot. By the way, Halle does not the Holocaust didn't happen. I just figured by the time I got around to this story you've already read it 15 times so I thought I'd put a unique spin around it. Good day. Pip Pip!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
~ Yeah! It's Time for "Guess the Rack" Again! ~ CelebritySmack
~ Courtney Love to Ruin History ~ AgentBedHead
~ Why Marie Osmond Dry-Humped the Ground ~ EvilBeet
~ Katie Holmes Almost Ghost Boobs ~ NinjaDude
~ Pink in Trouble? ~ FatBack
~ Britney's Friends Jump Ship ~ Yeeeah!
~ Carmen Electra Stole Tyra Banks' Hair ~ PopBytes
- Alert! Alert! Lauren and Brody are out drinking. Where's Brody's claw? And he has a haircut. No claw and his old haircut? Was this filmed in season 2?
- Stop the press. Kimberly? The new "Event Coordinator? The new Elodie? Oh I don't think so. No one can EVER replace Elodie. Ever. You hear me! In fact they should be raising Elodie's shirt up to the rafters of Bolthouse.
- Sidenote, how do I get a job at Bolthouse? Kim talks about being a New Yorker so she likes things fast paced. Do you also like douche, Kimmy? Because you're working with douche. Enjoy.
- Lauren and Whitney have a busy day at work, which consists of taking pictures. Luckily there is Red Bull all over the place to keep them awake as they snap picture after picture.
- And enter Gavin. Lauren is all smitten by Gavin and then they realize that they both worked on some random photoshoot back in the day. Wow what a stupid small douchey world.
- Look, I don't want to get in the habit of nicknaming everyone, but as I stated last week during the "next weeks scenes" Gavin is what I picture Bob the Builder to look like when he grows up. Please note, moving forward Gavin will only be referenced as "Bob the Builder." If Bob the Builder makes it into multiples episodes he may be referenced, at times, as "BTB."
- I love Whitney. How she's climbed up the corporate ladder and become Intern Mgr (of one intern...Lauren) is beyond me. That's all. Me gusta Whitney.
- As Bob the Builder is asking Lauren for her phone number so that they can go out on, potentially what I see as the most boring date ever, I notice something. I rewind my Tivo just to be sure. What is this I see? Ah yes, it's a non-white person in the background. Is this the first black person featured on The Hills? Even though this girl who is not white is sitting up against the wall. I saw her. I applaud The Hills for really breaking down barriers and allowing other races to get air-time. Even if it was unintentional and for literally 2 seconds.
- There she is again! She's sitting behind Whitney while Whitney eats her hair. Uh, what the girl can't get a chair because she's black? AND they make her sit behind Whitney. Wait a minute...Whitney...."W-h-i-t-e-n-e-y?" WhitEney? Oh my God, Whitney is a racist. Subliminal messages! Subliminal messages! I won't be fooled!
- Watching Heidi put on makeup is like watching the sunset for me. The faces she makes in the mirror are brilliant. It really makes her chin pop!
- Why is Heidi yelling while she talks with Steve Sanders from the bathroom? Their apartment is not that big. Maybe they should just get intercoms.
- Steve Sanders is all pissed that Heidi has to "work" a NASCAR event and will miss another anniversary dinner. Heidi tells Steve Sanders that he should "try working." I would have suggested that he try blinking first. Blink first, work second.
- Alright! It's another Brody BBQ.
- Wait a minute. Wait a god-damn minute. How is Brody's hair long again? And how is his claw back? In the first scene of the episode he has short hair and had no claw. Now? Longer hair. Claw. I've received emails from people telling me I'm losing my attention to The Hills detail. How's that for detail? I spotted "the girl of another race" in the background similar to a game of "Where's Waldo" and I noticed a different Brody. I'm back baby and more pathetic than ever!
- Bob the Builder goes to Brody's BBQ because....that's stupid.
- Bob the Builder talks about camping for what seems like hours. Lauren says she hates camping, so nice job dude on giving her the play by the play on camping.
- Where's Justin Bobby?
- Bob the Builder and Brody (and the claw) are grilling. Brody plays "big brother" to Bob the Builder by asking him a million questions. Uh, is Body on a date with BTB?
- Heidi and Kim are working the event and it's very official as Heidi has a clipboard.
- Of course Steve Sanders calls Heidi while she's at work and she tells him she has to work late. Steve Sanders gets all pissy and hangs up. Heidi starts telling Kim that Steve Sanders just called and is mad. First off, stop airing your dirty laundry. Second, I don't think Kim could care less. Elodie would NEVER just blow off Heidi's bitching. I miss Elodie. I miss "See Ya!." I'm sad. Sad and pathetic.
- And cue my favorite scene of the night. Steve Sanders goes to Heidi's work (with the camera crew) and the receptionist asks him for his name. She actually says, "And you are?" Brilliant. Who is this receptionist. Get her her own show. Although the fact that she didn't know who he is is BS.
- Steve wants to take Heidi for lunch but she can't go because of her...wait for it...wait for it...wait for it...new job that she's been working so hard on.
- Heidi walks away and again I think Steve Sanders is going to punch Heidi in her new boobs. This time I think he'll hit her with an open fist.
- Lauren and Bob the Builder go on their date. I lapse into a coma because it couldn't be any more boring.
- So, like the true whore-bag she is, Lauren calls Brody after her date and Brody suggests he come over to watch a movie. He asks Lauren what movie she's going to watch and she says "does it matter?" Most people think of sexual innuendos. Not me. I think she says, "does it really matter" because she really means there's really not a movie to watch because they're doing this just for the cameras and it's part of the script. Brody won't be going over. Lauren will be going to bed because the cameras will be gone.
Next week Lauren and Whitney come to NYC. I'll be looking for them! Steve Sanders calls Brody to "talk." Should be interesting.
The Hills: Lauren, Gavin, & Bob the Builder
I can't even. Words cannot describe the pure joy I've experienced while watching "The Making of Heidi Montard's Music Video." I can imagine this will be the same feeling I'll experience when I one day meet Jesus in Heaven. Pure joy.
Remember when your parents got their first video camera and you and your sister or brother would make movies, do interviews, music videos, etc? I can almost hear the screams of "Let's make a movie!" from my youth. Yeah, this is the same thing. Under no circumstances do I think that the way that Heidi and Steve Sanders are filming this video is anything close to how you make a music video. No way.
Watching Heidi try to dance all sexy (I can't even say it without giggling like a 7 year old school girl) on the beach WHILE Steve Sanders films it AND plays the song via a 1987 boombox is...well...it's just magic. This, folks, is one of the happiest days of my life. However, it gets better. Similar to Heidi's "performance" at her 21st birthday when she just started singing, she has brought back the "flailing arms dance." Bravo! Bravo! And then, when all else failed, she just got down on all fours and stuck her ass out in the air as the water tossed her around like the hideous sea-creature she is. Again, brilliant! There are too many great moments for me to choose just one, but I am also in awe of the guy fishing on the rock while Heidi "freak dances" next to him and he doesn't look at her once. Not even for a nano-second.
Today is truly a special day for me. It's a special day for all of us. Rejoice!
You see, this way they could have also used the devastating fires to plug Heidi's new album. Duh! Rookies.
Heidi and Spencer Stop ALL the Fires
Monday, October 22, 2007
~ When Soap Stars Attack ~ CelebritySmack
~ Paris Hilton Until the World Implodes ~ AgentBedHead
~ If J. Lo Isn't Pregnant, She's a Fat Ass ~ PopBytes
~ Amanda Bynes Has "Nana" Face ~ NinjaDude
~ Bill Maher Says No To Hecklers ~ POTP
~ Uma Thurman Shows a Little ~ FatBack
~ Rachel Bilson is Deep ~ EvilBeet
~ Kid Rock Plays Arrest Me, Again ~ Yeeeah
Britney, Lindsay, Paris, and crew may be total train-wrecks but you know who has their crap together? The Boston Red Sox. After being down 3 games to 1, the Sox were basically counted out, as they had to win the next 3-games in a row in order to make it to the World Series. If you're a Boston fan, you knew that this was completely possible as we've done it before (against the Yankees in 2004. Biggest choke in sports history...ring a bell?). Last nights game against the Indians was a do or die situation in game 7 and the Sox pulled out the win (11-2 ouch) and will be starting game 1 against the Colorado Rockies on Wednesday. This is big for me for a variety of reasons with the top two reasons being: (1) We're in the World Series, baby! (2) Game 1 starts on Harriet Carter Wednesday. That has to be a good sign.
Don't ever count out the Red Sox. See you at the World Series!!!
The Red Sox Heading to the World Series!
The judge is trying to teach you a lesson, shut your mouth and learn it! You are a bad mother, and so is your mother! Get your shit together and take care of your kids!! Your mom needs to lock your spoiled ass in the basement or wherever it is that you cannot get anymore drugs. Stop drinking immediately too! If you are too weak to do that, then you are no better than a crack whore on the street, and your mom should stop pimping your ass and do what mom's do...lock up your kid, and sit there with her for as long as it takes to get her right!!! Get guards around her to sober her up! SIT WITH YOUR KID, MOM! AFTER YOU AND HER DAD PIMPED HER OUT LIKE JON BENET, SIT THERE WITH HER AND STRAIGHTEN HER OUT...THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!! (not even hers, but yours, put pimping out your other daughter on hold til you make your grown one better).
Awesome! Bonus points for tossing in my favorite "Jon Benet."
Source it Up!!
Who Shot This!?!
Friday, October 19, 2007
Britney Runs Over Paparazzi Dude