Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Tori Spelling's Kids Head is Huge!

I'm assuming this sentence isn't grammatically correct, but Tori Spelling's kids head is huge. I have a friend (go figure) who brought up to me a little while back that Tori's kid, Liam, who is under 2-yrs old has the head the size of an 8-year old. My friend teaches America's youth so I will protect her name by calling her Balicia. Anyway, Balicia and I had a healthy conversation about the size of his head. No joke, I doubt they can get a sweater over that thing so it's lucky they live in California, where I'm pretty sure you can go shirtless anywhere and at any time. At least that's how I picture it. Moving on, Liam is a cute kid. There I said it. Happy now? I was actually nice to a child.

He's cute, but I'm very concerned for Tori Spelling's "gentlemen greeter." If his head was that big during child birth I sorta imagine her "downstairs area" like a scene from Alien. I'm also pretty sure that if you were to take a peek at Tori's gentlemen greeter you are certain to find Jim Walsh hiding in there. I don't believe for a second that he and Cindy Walsh moved to Hong Kong.

So, uh...er....what happened to Tori's hoo-ha after child birth with a head like that? Does it just stay like that? I imagine it to be similar to Silly Putty after birth. Ok, I decided to stop imagining this. Anyway, Tori, "the husband," and Liam were playing together at the park when "photographers just happened to stop by and snap their picture."

As a side note, if Tori's gentlemen greeter is still the size of a basketball I'm pretty sure she'll be able to give birth to her next child the same way you unblock your ears while on an airplane....just squeeze your nose and blow out. That kid will shoot out in under 2.5 seconds and at 144 mph. Ok I'm done.

No comments: