Thursday, May 15, 2008

Who Won America's Next Top Model 10?

Sad times, sad times. Last night was the season finale of America's Next Top Model Cycle 10. So who won? A hint is hidden in the photo above. Resident ANTM recapper, Jenny, stops by one last time this season to recap the absolute piss out of this episode and even sheds a little light on Jenny and her life. She's as crazy as IBBB and I like that. Here are her thoughts:

  • Well, it's finally the season finale and three contestants remain...Fatima, Whitney (not Houston) and Anya. Who will it be? Who really cares? I think there should be a surprise twist where Tyra crowns herself America's Next...........Top............Model.
  • The girls are shooting a Covergirl commercial and a Covergirl print ad. The print ad includes a billboard in Times Square. Saleisha shows up on the set of the shoot. Anya is crying. Probably because Saleisha is there. Cheer up, Anya...At least it's not Jaslene.
  • I think Jay is wearing lipstick again. He is sassy.
  • Ding Ding Ding! Tyra said it....not only did she say "You have to smile with your eyes," but also "there's a difference between this.....and this....." Oh Tyra, how I will miss you so now that the season is ending. Actually, I won't miss you at all.
  • Mean-a Paulina tells Anya that she looks stupid in her picture. Um, Paulina...do you know that you look like you used those old pink foam rollers that my mother used to make me sleep in for picture day?
  • It's judging time, part 1 A....and Fatima is G.O.N.E. Tyra spews some nonsense about Whitney, and who is Whitney, and are we figuring out who Whitney is, and who is the girl inside Whitney. Just shut up. This isn't America's Next Top Psychologist. PS, I am copy writing that, so don't even try to steal my TV show CW...or UPN...or Soapnet!
  • Looks like Whitney and Anya will get to stomp their way down the runway like horses trying to escape a barn fire.
  • Tyra goes over the prizes for the 4 hillionth time and critiques the runway show. Of COURSE when critiquing Whitney Tyra is reminded of herself in the Anne Klein fashion show...and happens to have a clip of it for all of us to enjoy.
  • Tyra starts reviewing all of their photos from the dawn of time. This is boring and I started to tune out. I realized a new pet peeve of mine today. It is when crossing guards insist on crossing you even though you're an adult. It's like, I'm 32 years old. I know how to cross the street and we aren't even near a school. Then it gets awkward. Do I start to cross before you give me the go ahead? Do I wait for you to tell me to go? If I go before you "cross" me, are you going to yell at me? Stupid.
  • HOLD IT.............HOLD IT.......Whitney is America's next top model? I mean, good for her and all....but I didn't see that coming from a mile away. My money was on Anya. Oh well. I guess Tyra and I don't see eye to eye. Not the first time. Farewell Tyra's insanity. Farewell Jay's lipstick.....Farewell Miss Jay's glitter brows. Til we meet again...or will we? Aren't there rumors that Tyra is leaving this train wreck? Maybe she could have a reality show to recast her own self. Hmmmmmmmm........
All Previous ANTM Recaps

2 comments:

*..Jeru..* said...

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo WTF is wrong with Tyra :S
B*ch is crazier than I thought!!!

Anonymous said...

eww how cud she pick her!! oooh helll nooooooooooo