Tuesday, July 29, 2008

The Jonas Brothers: What Exactly Are They. Someone Please Explain. And....Go!

I never really feel that old. I usually pride myself on being pretty knowledgeable on all current events and by "current events" I really mean "stupid pop culture crap." However I can honestly say I know nothing about The Jonas Brothers. Nothing. When researching things to post about on good old IBBB I always come across Jonas Brothers stuff, but never read it. From what I can gather, they are singers? Are they from England? I think they are. And how is Miley Cyrus involved with them? And, more importantly, who is Selma Gomez? And who is Demi Lovato? And why are these three names always associated with The Jonas Brothers? Are they all virgins? Is that the deal? Are they all the same person? Is it like the Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montanna thing? Am I old?

I'm totally and utterly confused. Therefore I am reaching out to you, the IBBB readers, to explain to me exactly what The Jonas Brothers are. I feel that knowing this will "help me get in good with the 'the kids.'" While you're at it, tell me everything you know about Demi and Selma. I think I'm pretty up-to-speed on Miley. Her southern cackalacky twang and deep hick voice tells me all I need to know.




Anonymous said...

Pop, Disney channel. Don't do it.

Amy Jonas said...

The Jonas Brothers are the best band on earth! Now who can get me back stage passes??

xoxoxo said...

Slema Gomez and Demi are both sluts who want to be Miley Cyrus but never will be. They're total wannabes.

Your cute by the way ;)

Biggest Jonas Fan EVER! said...

The Jonas Brothers are the best music group EVER!! And they have the best provide the BEST music for their fans!! And three cuties who are the most famous people ever. AND, Kevin is the BEST GUITAR PLAYER EVER! Nick HAS THE MOST AMAZING VOICE EVER!!! And Joe has the coolest sense of style EVER!!! The Jonas Brothers are some AMAZING people!!

yyz said...

Jonas Brothers=Virgin Popband (seriously they have chastity belt/rings)
Selena Gomez=Miley replacement
Demi Lovato=Miley replacement
one of the girls is dating one of the Jonas, therefore inticing Jihad with Miley and they're on some sort of Youtube brawl...
and there you have it, in a NUTSHELL

Anonymous said...

omg, I'm 29 like you and I totally agree with everything you just said..

that song that goes "this is an SOS don't wanna 2nd guess".. they do that...if that helps.. although i don't think u should feel old about not knowing.. i never watched the disney channel when i was 16..more like 8..
My 1st grade class have posters of miley cyrus in their lockers... so i think that's more the age group,

oh and the jonas bros are jersey boys.. from a very affluent town.

IBBB said...

Holy Christ! Looks like there are Jonas lovers and haters out there.

and I'm so old I thought her name was Selma...so Selena. I'm like my parents.


Anonymous said...

Actually, I think it is Selma. Only because I read something the MSN homepage or something that said "Miley vs. Demi and Selma" and I thought "Why is Miley fighting Demi Moore and Selma Hayek?" And then I ignored it.

Anonymous said...

WHAT??? The jonas brothers or sisters whatever are just another disney cookie-cutter band, trying to sound like a beat up Mike Jackson and the youngest one does a great impression of Miss Brit Spears voice. They are annoying and wtf are they on rolling stone mag? what is wrong with people these days?!?!?!??!?!?

Anonymous said...

I don't get them either.

beatrix said...

Oh thank god! you know so little about them, it actually makes me feel good. I was starting to feel old as well.

Here's what I know:

Jonas Brothers: there's 3 of them, and there's an ugly one who's always on the lower right corner on every picture. The other two look like homosexual androgynous twins but one is apparently older than the other one and they are both allegedly males. One of the older less ugly ones dated Miley.

Selena/selma/demi: are both about 13 and have some stupid youtube videos talking about how dark their makeup is and their power rangers t shirts, which is ridiculous because they don't even know who the power rangers were and all they saw was the digitally-enhance-post1999 version of the real power rangers.

Miley and her 40year-old midget and BFF made fun of selma/salami/selena/demi on their own youtube account.

The Jonas bitches have been making either movies or series, and at some point selena/selma/demi act in one of those and now they are all in middle school, the drama begins, and one of them is dating the same Jonas, Miley dated in pre-school.

The end.

JDizzle said...

Vomit. Yes that is what they are... Vomit.

F-in A. I feel so old when I hear spew about them (i'm freaking 24!) Ugh time to go pull out my n*sync posters.

Anonymous said...

PS - One of these Jonas Boys is the re-incarnate of Rick Springfield. I'm pretty sure there will be a remake of Jessie's Girl since they already re-hacked Kids In America...oh yes, they did.

Anonymous said...

Both Selena and Demi have youtube shows where they plug disney crap.
It's actually kinda hilarious.

They were also on the Barney show back in the day and therefor picked up from Disney when they were youngins.

As for the Jonas Brothers- girls are obsessed with them and by them, i mean just the two cute ones and not the one who looks like a 35 year old gamer with bad hair.

murray said...

if you want to make millions...no billions of dollars you must tap into the elementry school/tweenager group (7-13)....a little over 50 percent of the population is under 25...this is exactly what the blood sucking disney corporation is doing...

carol said...

hanson, anyone??

they were three, one of them was pretty ugly, one of them had a female voice, they were all so pure and stuff...just like the jonas brothers.

the jonas brothers are hanson wannabes, except that hanson used to have better songs.

Anonymous said...

Slema Gomez and Demi are both sluts who want to be Miley Cyrus but never will be. They're total wannabes.

okay thats funny. because, both selena and demi have NEVER taken any scandalous pictures like miley has. or done anything scandalous at all for that matter. i love all 3 of them.

and you know what really makes me sick?

if how fucking cruel you guys are to disney channel stars. their KIDS. their growing up and LEARNING. just like we all did. who cares if they take a different route. They are all talented kids, and they will grow in their careers. But just because their disney, does not mean their scum.

give them a chance. to thoes of you who have kids, or want to someday need to understand that the kids who work on disney are always going to be role models to your kids. They'll always want to be on disney channel just like them. What will you tell them, '' Dont get involved with thoes wanna be sluts? ".

Come on, how pathetic are you. Do something more productive with your time than bashing kids.


OH AND BTW- the jonas brothers are a brother band from new jersey. They believe strictly in God, and staying pure untill marriage. (GREAT ROLEMODELS!). They are also very talented. Their music is maturing as they get older, and its getting better and better. I really like this band- and they ARE associated with disney. But they didnt use to be. they started off on their own- disney picked them up.

Give disney a chance, seriously. What would you rather let your kids watch, Camp Rock and Hannah Montana, or The Girls next door and the hills?

think about it.