Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Seriously What? The Marcia Brady/Maureen McCormick Story is as Crazy as Nikki Blonsky Kicking Bianca's Mother in the Vagina

Ok so this is day old news at this point, but so is your mother. I am completely baffled by all the hoopla surrounding Maureen McCormick's new book, "Here's the Story: Surviving Marcia Brady and Finding My True Voice." How's your long title?

Anyjinx, Maureen was on The Today Show yesterday talking about the book and revealing information as completely random as when we recently heard that Nikki Blonsky kicked Bianca's (from America's Next Top Model) mother in the vagina at a Caribbean airport before she was sat on. Again, what!?! So here's what Maureen had to reveal....get ready for the random:
  • Maureen's mother went crazy from syphilis

  • Maureen's grandmother went crazy from syphilis

  • Growing up Maureen thought that she had syphilis

  • Just to keep track, we've had 3 mentions of syphilis to far

  • She almost got her cherry popped by Greg Brady, but his parents walked in an stopped them.

  • Maureen had a crush on Mike Brady before she knew he was the homosexual

  • Maureen made a joke in an interview years ago that she and Eve Plumb (Jan Brady) kissed and Eve Plumb no longer talks to Maureen over this.

  • Maureen did "uppers," was freebasing, and was doing coke.

  • Maureen had dos abortions

  • Maureen dated Michael Jackson and Steve Martin

  • Maureen traded sex for drugs

If anyone is keeping track Maureen has officially hit tilt on the "Whack-o-Meter." Seriously, can we talk more about the syphilis running rampant throughout her family?

For kids preparing for the SATs, here's a little help for you: Bianca from America's Next Top Model is to Getting Kicked in the Vagina by Nikki Blonsky, as The Mother of Maureen McCormick is to getting sphylis with the Grandmother.


Mrs. IBBB said...

Is it just me or does Lauren Conrad look more like Maureen McCormick with every passing day?

Chus said...

This is what I think: Brady Bunch star Maureen McCormick traded sex for drugs