Thursday, February 05, 2009

Hey Stupids! Gotta Question for IBBB?

A spinoff of "Spencer's Busy...Let IBBB Take a Message," IBBB is proud to present you with another installment of "Hey Stupids! Gotta Question for IBBB?" Here's how this works. You have a question or need advice, you send me an email. I read it. I advise. Sometime, depending on my mood, I advice as well. Here are some recent questions/comments I've received. The names have been changed to protect the trashy.


Dear IBBB,

I'm graduating college in May and haven't found a job yet since the no one is hiring. Can you possibly pay me to just read your blog? I do it anyway!

Signed,
Unemployed


Dear Unemployed,
The economy isn't that bad when you really think about it. Let's face it, you have no real experience so even in a great economy I'm sure you're not getting a high-level job anyway. See how I view the glass as "half-full?" Regardless of what the economy is doing, you know who is always hiring? Always? Pimps. That's right, Unemployed, if you're willing to do $2 dollar sucky-sucky on the corner of Washington and Broadway then you'll be just fine. And, if you're smart about it you'll bring your "services" to Hollywood and perhaps you'll end up banging someone famous in which they'll either pay you a ton of money...or turn your story into a movie or television series on HBO. So remember this last bit of advice boys and girls...when the economy starts to really blow.....blow back.

Wear Protection,
IBBB


Dear IBBB,
I miss The Hills. Is that bad? I feel like it is.

Signed,
Hills Fanatic

Dear Hills Fanatic,
I could, of course, completely tee off on you. However, I won't. I won't because I, too, miss The Hills. I miss the old Hills....you know, season 2? I miss the days when Heidi looked like Heidi. I miss the days when Audrina just sat behind the receptionist desk and only had 2 lines per episode. I miss the days when Lisa Loveless would rule the office with an iron fist. I miss the days when Lauren and Heidi didn't look like they were about to hit the red carpet in every scene. While I'm at it, I miss Laguna Beach. I do. None of that Newport Habor crap...I'm talking actual Laguna Beach. It will be back soon. Keep the faith.

In Desperate Need of a Life,
IBBB

Dear IBBB,
What's in your iPod?

Signed,
Nosy iPoder


Dear Nosy iPoder,
What's in your bank account? None of your business.

Getting a Restraining Order,
IBBB

Gotta question for IBBB? Email it. Or don't. Either way, I'm not losing sleep over this.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I miss The Hills too. I hate the city.

JVee said...

Are the Friends really friends?